cant move

in a bottle-cap
a red one
it has rusted edges
and dream drops
they stay,
nestled
within its metallic core.
cant breech out they close
the glass up
in the bottle-
under the bottle cap they nap asleep.
they breathe in and out slowly
barely.
locked inside
forever under a faded
map-
revealing the shape of
a suffocating bottle.
the map stretches out
the world.

how many times?
will i leave empty handed
with broken pieces in my hands
watching someone else whole
watching someone else put together
and loved
and held
how many times will i hold myself
while the circle
the circle of
black tears pulls me in
over and over again

its okay.
ill get over you
i know im not white
and i dont stand out to you
its okay
ill get over you
ill ask for the strength
ill beg for it.
its okay
 ill swallow any tears
hard hard
swallow hard
till they
are all gone
you made it obvious i know
you showed me clear
mesmorized by another
your eyes never falling on me
your knees bent infront of
a white statue with
perfect lines
not a messy girl
confused likeme.
you wanted me to know
that i
am nothing
i am everyone i am anyone.
i dont need you anyway
i never needed you.
i only craved.
i only admired
and dreamed
and ill wake up now
ill wake up
im sorry i will wake up.

i feel small
again unseen
like the bud of a flower
hidden in the dirt
im lonely and covered
and cold
today i am confronted with
separation
of those i know and love
and someone i do not know
confronted with the changing of this season
seeing clear that
death is coming
coming on him quick
he wont get to die 
where he wants 
or will he
and i am not there
..do i even care..
i can not know.
i know nothing of
death
i never let the fear of it
show.

I Have Heard about the Days of old
About the men who followed You
And how they saw the Supernatural
And became the chosen few
So I come before You now
Tearing off my earthly crowns
for this one thing I have Found

I want Faith Like That
To see the dead rise
or to see You pass by
Oh I, I want Faith Like That
Whatever the cost
I'll suffer the loss, Oh I
I want Faith Like That

I'm not Looking for a miracle
Signs and Wonders are things thereof
I caught a glimps of what You want from me
and what I have is not enough
I read the story one more time
of Those who gave to You Their lives
With no fear or compromise


I want the Faith That can move any mountain
and send them to the sea
I want the Faith that can break every stronghold
That keeps you, keeps you from me

I want Faith Like That
To see the dead rise
or to see You pass by
Oh I, I want Faith Like That
I want Faith Like That
To see the dead rise
or to see You pass by
Oh I, I want Faith Like That
Whatever the cost
I'll suffer the loss, Oh I
I want Faith Like That, a Faith like that

wanting what i cant have
wanting
wanting
but i dont know when is best
what is best
i can want
something
deadly
and naively chase it

do i remember that You are faithful?

copeland- Dorie

He's in love with tragedy, in love with tragedy
She was a wreck, but he loved her
She was a wreck, but so was he
And the last time he saw Dorie, he didn't know what to say
"Thank you because you loved me,
It's all on me cause I didn't want to stay, I didn't want to stay..."

Live, live, live, live because you
Love, love, love and love will make you
Give, give, give and give in when you
Break, break, break but you just want to
Fix yourself just to break again..

  for my image of woman in lit class we read several amazing stories and poems that at the heart speak about the oppression and suppression of woman throughout history. Another central theme however is the idea that God and Christianity has taken away freedom from women. The concept is that woman should reclaim their Self with a capitol S. they should reclaim their sexuality and embrace their imaginations and sexuality with no bounds. Any boundary is a hindered to the "Self". This was very grievous because although it is terribly true that woman have and continue to be denied self expression , we should not however blame God for human wickedness. And to retaliate embrace not just creativity and imagination but embrace rebellion against God.Not realizing that true life, true identity is and freedom is found in knowing Christ. So i decided to write a response to the poem "Eve by Dorothy Livesay because it covers general themes we explored through the class. I pray God will heal our women and we can find solace and our desires rooted in his Truth.

'EVE' BY Dorothy Livesay

Eve

Beside the highway

at the motel door

              its roots

the last surviver of a pioner

                 orchard

miraculously      still

                bearing

A thud another apple falls

               I stop     and O

that scent, gnarled, ciderish

                with sun it

that woody pulp

                 for teeth and tongue

                 to bite and curl around

that spurting juice

                earth-sweet!

In fifty seconds, fifty summers sweep

              and shake me-

I an alive!      can stand

                up still

hoarding this apple in my hand.

Creative response to Eve p 595

Poison Apples

As you rush to reclaim

Everything you think

Is yours

Do you spill

With joy

Or are you hungry for more?

Are you sure your prize will keep you

Alive?

Is there something you do not know,

Feigning eyes?

About the fruit that grows grows

Sick

Deep

Out of your soul into hoarding palms?

And what if all the

Laws carved rough

In a slab of stone,

Were not to strike you,

Not to Leave you empty

scratched out and erased;

  

Oh no but instead to reveal

the richest of tastes?

you  will

Fall short.

You have;

Look at the scars on your knees and

Know more will come.

But friend,

To swallow

A healing cup filled with Grace-

Bought by a Lover’s clean blood

Purchased to clean you up­;

Oh------- the taste!

Enough to drop the poison apple,

Touching your lips.

Keep your Free hands open.

Let go to live let it go to

Live.

god are you just my inspiration
my helper
my example


no no no!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
be my savior
i need a savior